Parents In Open Relationships Break Down How They Raise Their Children
Originally Published on Rebel Circus
Dating and going on dates alone can be a difficult task but dating while being a parent is even more difficult. You have to consider your parenting skills and your dating skills all at once because your kids see it all and they take note of everything that we do. There are parents who are in open relationships and have still managed to manage that open relationship and their children.
A different environment. Having an open relationship, changes the environment that kids grow up in.
Why it changes. Those in an open relationship generally don't limit their openness to one night and it's more of a philosophy and way of life. This changes the whole idea of love for the children.
Aware of the good and bad. This allows your child to better understand that their is positive and negatives in the world because their environment constantly demonstrates new loves, new risks and new influences.
Conditional love. The love that she has for adults is a conditional love, where as she loves them by many different conditions, rather it's a way it makes you feel or by what that person can do for you.
My kids love is unconditional. The love that you have for your children should be unconditional. They don't have to do anything to claim your love. Ensuring that there is a difference between conditional an unconditional love allows the children to understand that their parent will always love them.
Different role models. Children can benefit from having different role models around. When you have one specific role model in your environment, you're subjected to one package of traits and qualities to learn from.
Multiple ways. Having multiple role models also allows a child to be understanding, flexible, and open-minded. They can understand and comprehend that there is multiple ways to do different things and there are multiple ways that a person can be.
Having to be dishonest. Being dishonest about your relationship with someone new allows yourself leeway about the situation. Kids usually trust who their parents trust and if your children see that a person is lovey-dovey with someone, they trust them. Is being dishonest at the beginning of a relationship protects your kids from trusting someone too soon.
Prompted a slow build. Being cognitive about what you do around your child allows you to take your relationship slower too. It gives you more time to really get to know your new partner. It benefits you and your children.
Biggest impact is stress. Due to open relationships creating a ever-changing environment, it can cause confusion with children.
Children need stability. It has been proven by psychologists and researchers that children generally thrive in environments that provide some sense of stability. Having different people around at different time does not provide stability. You can balance this by choosing to have very few stable relationships so there is some sort of consistency.
Backlash about sexuality. Those in open relationships tend to receive a lot of negative comments about their lifestyle. They're called sluts, unstable, unreliable parent, and other unpleasant comments. If your child hears or witnesses these types of comments, it can alter their opinion of you as a person.
Turning a negative situation into something positive. A way to combat negativity is to promote sexuality-positivity to your children. If your children understand that people have the right to do and be what they want, then their opinion of you won't change much.
The potential for bullying. If you're open about your open relationships, then your kids can be bullied at school. This can especially happen if you are not in a diverse area.
Combating bullying. A way to deal with bullying is living in a community that is readily diverse. Diversity minimizes the chances of bullying because more people are understanding of people and their differences. Being in a diverse area also opens your children up to other ways and lifestyles that are different from yours.